GAMES GUYS PLAY

Emily Ann

May 21, 2013

 

[dropcap type="circle" color="#F70C37" background="#050000"]I[/dropcap]always laugh when I come across different relationship "self-help" books and articles that try to convince it's female readers that men are these simple, unemotional, and unsuspecting drama-free creatures that don't care enough about relationships and women to involve themselves in things like playing games, using tests, or "freaking out" for highly inarticulate reasons over the course of a relationship.   Such was the major underlying premise in the highly popular cult phenomena, He's Just Not That Into You, by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo.

[space height="HEIGHT"]
[space height="HEIGHT"]

[fbliked]
The fact of the matter is however, men do have minds.  They think about the future.  They are not as innocent and stupid as they would like everyone to believe, and they commonly play games and use tactics to help them navigate their way through relationships in an effort to find the "right one".

The following are common tests men use to determine relationship worthiness. Being aware of these tests will help ensure you pass each exam with flying colors![space height="HEIGHT"] [space height="HEIGHT"]

[dropcap type="circle" color="#F70C37" background="#050000"]1[/dropcap]You hook up on the first date. [space height="HEIGHT"]

The Test:  When a guy goes on a date with a girl he's attracted to and interested in, he's going to try to sleep with her on the first night.  He'll try to convince the girl that if they have sex, it's not going to change the impression he has of her, or make him loose interest.  He might even say the act will only cause him to like her more.  Although the guy really does want to have sex, he's secretly hoping and praying that the girl will say no.  Guys want a smart, confident girl.  One who won't compromise her values for anyone, let alone a guy she just met.  [space height="HEIGHT"]

[dropcap type="circle" color="#F70C37" background="#050000"]2[/dropcap]There is an imbalance in the amount of effort each is putting forth. [space height="HEIGHT"]

Guys want a girl to reciprocate the amount of effort he is willing to put forth toward the relationship--but not an ounce more.  The Test: When a guy is interested in a girl, he might intentionally pull back to see how the girl reacts.  During this time it is key that the girl is able to show him that she's only willing to exert as much effort into trying to talk to or see him, as he is willing to exert toward trying to talk to or see her.  When an imbalance occurs in the relationship, and the girl makes more of an effort to call, text, or make plans to see him, the guy freaks out and losses interest.  He perceives the girl to be clingy, needy, or possibly even desperate. [space height="HEIGHT"]

[dropcap type="circle" color="#F70C37" background="#050000"]3[/dropcap]The girl is quick to get into a relationship.[space height="HEIGHT"]

Guys want to feel special in the eyes of their girl.  They want to feel as though they had to battle or struggle to rightfully win over the heart and affection of the girl they desire, and to feel as though this accomplishment was not one that is readily attainable to just anybody.  The Test:  A guy might test a girl and act more serious towards her than he would normally to determine whether the girl will be quick to jump into things with him. When a girl is too quick to get involved in a serious relationship or commitment, a guy is likely to freak out and lose interest.  He'll likely perceive the girl to be desperate and conclude that it's not him she's after, but rather the security a committed relationship can provide.[space height="HEIGHT"]

[dropcap type="circle" color="#F70C37" background="#050000"]4[/dropcap]He realizes that he wants a relationship with you.  [space height="HEIGHT"]

The Test: When a guy begins to consider the possibility of taking the relationship to the next level, he's likely to pull back.  Most guys don't take commitment lightly.  Thus, they're highly unlikely to rush into a relationship without experiencing some feeling of wanting to rebel or pull back in an effort to determine whether he's making the correct decision.  During this time, if the girl is able to provide him with the time and space he needs, the guy is likely to solidify the relationship and take things to the next level.

[/fbliked]


Games Guys Play by Emily Croushore is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at http://wp.me/p3vlzt-cn.