Gas lighting is a term used by mental health professionals (no I am not one) to describe a form of emotional abuse where a guy manipulates his girlfriend or wife into believing there is something "wrong" with her. It occurs when a guys purposely says or does something to provoke a certain response from his partner. Once satisfied with her reaction, he makes her feel insecure by behaving as though her reaction was completely off-basis, overblown, or down-right cray-cray.
GUYS USE GAS LIGHTING TO:
Gain Control
Guys may use Gas lighing to keep his girlfriends or wives "in check" by making her feel unsafe or even fearful of expressing her true feelings and emotions. He does this by using the reaction Gaslighting provokes as potential reasons for why:
- He treats her bad
- There are problems in their relationship
- He's not faithful
- He unable to commit or take the relationship to the next level.
To Deflect From His Own Bad Behavior
Guys most commonly use Gas lighting when being confronted about inconsiderate or insensitive behavior, or acts of indiscretion and suspicions of infidelity. In order to deflect from his behavior, guys uses Gas lighting to prompt a certain reaction from the girl and then use as evidence to discredit and disclaim her initial feelings of hurt and/or suspicions of unfaithfulness.
To Prevent Himself From Feeling Bad
Most men are incapable of recognizing or taking responsibility for their own bad behavior, no matter how reckless, blatant, or how much pain it causes their partner. Why? Because our society conditions men to distance themselves from their emotions, and coping up to misdeeds means they would be opening themselves up to feelings of guilt, remorse, and sadness.
To Provide Justification for Continued Mistreatment
When a recognizes he is successfully able to Gaslight a girl, he'll not only use the tactic repeatedly, but every time he's able to get away with it, he'll lose respect for the girl. The guy comes to perceive her as weak, inferior, and deserving of the manipulation. In his mind, this only goes to justify any further or increasingly severe mistreatment toward her.
HOW TO PREVENT IT FROM HAPPENING TO YOU
Avoid guys who gas light at all costs. If you are newly involved with someone and you find him using this tactic to control you, it is highly advised you end the relationship immediately. Gas lighting demonstrates a guy's willingness to resort to manipulation, and indicates a potential for physical abuse later on in the relationship.
Creative Commons License
Gas lighting and How It Effects Every Woman by Emily Croushore is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at http://wp.me/p3vlzt-ev.
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